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Even at Christmas thieves never stop working. They never get holidays. Its unfair really, they'd like some time off I'm sure. I'm surprised they don't go on strike.
That'd be good wouldn't it - loads of thieves standing by roadsides, burning wood in oildrums to keep warm and holding "Fair Deal For Thieves" banners.
Fellow thieves would honk their horns in support as they drove past in borrowed cars.
There'd be heated TV arguments between the government and the leader of the Thieves Nion (it would be Union, but someone stole the U).
Imagine. The country would be in turmoil. There wouldn't be anything for police to do, so in boredom they'd start being really pernickity about speeding, parking tickets, tax etc. The general public would be hounded to misery and back again! We'd all have to support the thieves just to get the rozzers off our backs. Some cops might even go mad at have nothing to do, and packs of them would start roving the countryside, devouring sheep.
Manufacturers of security hardware would all go bust, jobs would be lost. The bottom would fall out of the black market and everyone would have to pay top dollar for new VCRs and DVD players - causing widespread poverty, forcing interest rates to skyrocket, causing another bust like the eighties - and we don't want to go there again do we?
Our country needs thieves. Support your local burglar. |
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Date posted: 19 Dec, 2003 13:11 by Reg
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Wild's comments to not necessarily agree with the rest of the editorial staff.
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Date posted: 19 Dec, 2003 13:18 by munky"the fence"brain
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you wanna buy anything ?
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Date posted: 19 Dec, 2003 13:19 by BDM
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someone broke into Chelsea FC last night and stole Joe Cole..I mean some laptops. Roman isn't very happy as his insurance is going to go up!
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Date posted: 19 Dec, 2003 13:56 by BadgerMushroom
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Thieves are funny, unless they nick my stuff. Then they're not, they're twats
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Date posted: 19 Dec, 2003 13:59 by Reg
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If thieves don't nick stuff, then they're not thieves though, are they?
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Date posted: 19 Dec, 2003 15:49 by bigdaaddymerk
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good question. but is a peadophile only a peado when he/she is fiddling kids?
Is a mad man only mad when he's dancing in a cowboy hat in the middle of the street?
Is Robbie Williams only a twat when i see him on the telly or is he a twat behind closed doors too?
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