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Herewith, without there which within and without further outage, the announcement of the winners of this years Funjunkie Fantabulous Follower Competition is announced!!!
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Its Monday, its the end of the nomination stage of our (seemingly ancient) Camcorder Competition, and so now its time that you guys voted for the winner.
We've rigged a special voting page up for the event, and there are three categories for you to vote in. Let slip the dogs of... er... voting!
You have one week to pick the winners. |
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You have until Monday morning to get your final entries in for our fine competition to win a digital camcorder!!
We've had some amazing/awe-inspiring/rude/hilarious/shit entries, so well done to all who've entered so far!
Don't let them win! Its not too late for you to enter, so grab your camera, and get a photo of you holding some sort of funjunkie sign and get it sent in pronto!
Remember, no photoshop/digitally altered entries please. If you're one of the few that sent one in, get a proper one sorted out straightaway for a chance to win!
The voting will begin sometime shortly after the deadline on Monday, and you'll all be able to vote for the winner in 3 categories: The Best, the Worst and the Funniest. We'll also be awarding a special Editor's Choice prize as well, and there'll be prizes akimbo, from the camcorder, to space hoppers, to David Hasselhoff merchandise! |
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Tammie, not content with her first attempt (No.8), has provided us with our first absolutely not work safe entry. It's a bid for the male vote. She may have it.
Click image to enlarge - Just work safe
Click image to enlarge - NOT WORK SAFE
We accept no responsibility for you spitting hot tea over your monitor while viewing these entries. |
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Slightly suspiciously, this entry comes from someone called 'Matthew'. Now, call me a cynic (Go on, I dare you), but either 'Matthew' has got a fine pair of man-boobs, or 'Matthew' is in fact a girl trying to hide her identity. What do you reckon?
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p.s. Don't try and claim this picture as your own, because 'Matthew' has sent in his/her address with the entry |
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We've hit the big 20, and only one more week* to go before voting starts. And our 20th entry is from Lindsay who says she's having trouble washing off the Kohl pencil.
That's all very well missy, but Jason's been trying to get his off for over a week, and he's run out of sandpaper and wire wool.
Funjunkie: Keeping stomachs happy everywhere.
*Yeah you remember... we extended the deadline. |
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Big Gav is sending them across as fast as I can post them!
"This is Ray or Uncle Albert as we like to call him, one of the Security officers at Siemens. The reason we call him Uncle Albert is that he is ex Royal Navy, and if you can remember Only fools and Horses, Uncle Albert kept on saying "When I was in the war..."
Also the Funjunkie sign in the picture is on the main Notice board for Siemens that customers see. Just before I took this picture a Customer walked in and saw the board and asked who Funjunkie was. As I was there I just said that it one of Siemens Customers."
We are? Oh, yeah, we err... ordered all that... stuff, didn't we?
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Big Gav is now on a quest. He's single handedly trying to double the number of entries in the competition. If there's anyone out there that needs a really highly motivated member of staff, maybe you should talk to him.
This is Jacqui. She's a bit shy. Or so she says she is, but by reading what she's put, I tend to disagree.
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And last, but not least, we welcome Tony.
Big Gav says "This guy is funny. He is alway doing practical jokes on everyone, but he drinks herbal tea, and most people in the office think he is gay, but he's not, his wife is quite fit."
Tone, I'm sorry to break the news to you like that, if you didn't already know, but look on the bright side, it's all out in the open now. Gav thinks you're OK, and no one's going to argue with him are they?
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The second of Big Gav's sponsored entries is Tracy.
"This is Tracy from the post room at Siemens. I took my laptop down to the post room so she could have a look at the site, and she wanted to enter. She is a lovely girl."
She may be lovely, but now she's seen you in the nude Gav, apart from a flimsy piece of paper. How's that going to effect your working relationship?
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Big Gav (Entry No.4) has donned his FJ helpers badge* and gone round his offices on a manic Peter Parker style photo spree! He's just sent in THREE entries, and since he knows them better than I do**, I'll let him do the talking:
"This is Derek the maintenance guy at Siemens. He is a dirty old f^^^er, as he goes round the call centre changing light fitting when they don't need to be changed just so he can look down the girls tops."***
He sounds like a top fella to me - good on you Derek.
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*Send a S.A.E to FJ HQ
**Not suprising really, I didn't know they even existed before he sent the pictures in
***FJ is just repeating this bit of hearsay. Don't sue us. |
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"Good God ladies, have you lost your decorum?" Is what I might say if I were a victorian vicar from veensgath, but I'm not, so I'm going to say "GET IN THERE!!!"
Probably inspired by Tim Henman's roaring succes at Wimbledon, FJ gets it's first female tonsil tennis team! Congratulations Janet S, you've finally broken the FJ lesbo duck. Please send us some glue so we can repair it.
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It's his birthday, and he'll cry if he wants too, cry if he want... OK I'll shut up. Big John celebrates his birthday, by just about squeezing into his photograph. Slippery Nipples anyone?
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Wild was hoping that we'd get some entries with FJ readers chumming up to celebrities, but he didn't bargain on the celebs entering themselves! Yes, we've got Peter Jackson everybody! The man who brought us loads of low budget antipodean schlock and Bored of the Rings.
brrring...brrring...
*click* Hello?
Oh, err... appologies. I've just been informed that it's not that Pete Jackson. It's a different one. Oh well. He does look like gollum though, doesn't he?
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p.s. read the bit in biro |
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It's not a claim to rival the famous Freddy Starr headline, but Toby K boldly assures us 'he ate funjunkie'. Apparently it was slightly salty, with a crisp underside.
That's why he had to swill it down with lashings of Kronenbourg 1664. How does he keep his figure?
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The deadline for submissions to the Finest Funjunkie Follower competition has now been extended to the 6th July.
You've got no excuses not to develop those films now. Get snapping - or else we'll send Jason round. |
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We've hit double figures in the number of competition entries thanks to the endeavours of the delightful Karen F. She spent absolute minutes in the sun getting an English tan in the shape of a heart just so she could put FJ in the middle.
Or is it a pair of angel wings?
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I love the fact that I'm just sitting at my desk minding my own business, when there's a little bleep telling me that I've got new mail.
I open Outlook, expecting it to be a client complaining about something I should have done, but instead, it's a photo of a bloke I've never met before, dressed up as a fairy.
Pure Class.
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FJ regular, the charming Tammie C, decides she's not content with just winning an exclusive limited edition Domukun Toaster from us, and tries her luck at adding a camcorder to her list of freebies. Be warned - it contains nudity*
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*Of sorts |
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There were five in the bed, and the little one said "Hey, which dirty bastard just farted?"
After throwing their car keys in a bowl, Nicola and her "Good Friends" decided to get down to business. Ladies and Gentlemen: I give you... The Funjunkie Orgy.

Who's hand was that???
Shame about the spelling though, eh? |
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Saturday sees the turning point of the "Finest Funjunkie Follower" as Jason, our hero of the day, decides to throw caution to the wind and show, in no uncertain terms, his dedication to the cause...

Prepare to be amazed.
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Lisa C joins the competition with her fruity* entry. I'm not exactly sure what 'the message' being portrayed is actually trying to tell us, but at least she got off her arse and entered. Which is more than I can say for the rest of you (unless you are in the tiny minority of people who have entered).
*Yes, a tomato is a fruit, stop arguing
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I hereby declare that the competition is now truly underway. This is the one to beat - say hello to the awesome sight that is Big Gav!
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I wonder if Neighbourhood watch choked on their tea as much as I did when this appeared in my inbox? |
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FJ occassional, Phil 'the Power' Simms joins the competition with his heavy weight entry. A theme of gentlemen exposing their mid-riffs seems to be developing.
You don't have to show us your belly, but if you do it with this much verve and aplomb, then congratulations.
I hope that marker pen hasn't seeped through onto his lovely t-shirt.
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The lovely Karen G, occassional contributor to the FJ music section, enters the competition with a picture of understated nonchalance. It's as if she's saying 'Get it over and done with, then get out of my face, you goon'.
Oh, that's what she actually did say.
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We have our first entry, thanks to FJ regular Kaiser! He is portraying a classic english scene of a bloke having a a fag while exposing himself in the back garden of a public house.
For any of you trying to capture the essence of what is quintessentially British, this goes along side the great traditions of eating a kebab on the way home, and wearing a knotted hanky on your head while on the beach.
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For those of you who have been reading Funjunkie over the last couple of days, you probably know that Reg entered a competition to win the title of Northampton's sexiest bloke. But here at Funjunkie towers, we want to give you the chance to be involved in a much higher profile competition.
Sod the free hair cuts! We're going to give you the chance to win some truly amazingly fantabulous Funjunkie prizes! That's right kids... We're giving away the top prize of a Digital Camcorder. Not only that, but the runners up will receive such sought after items as Space Hoppers and David Hasselhoff Merchandise!
You're stoked right?
So here's the competition:
The Finest Funjunkie Follower
We want you to send in a photo of yourself to be entered into the Finest Funjunkie Follower poll. Once we have all the photos, we'll put them to the vote and you lot get to judge the winners.
However, it aint just that simple. Here's the rules...
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Please be aware that the views expressed by the writers of Funjunkie do not necessarily represent those of Funjunkie.
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