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The Summer Burn has started! Check your inbox now. |
FJ Editors : Taz |
Stuck in the furthest outpost of the Funjunkie empire, Taz was always set up to be the underdog of the team. Way back before the B-Team were drafted in, when Funjunkie was run by Wild (or "Bowner" as he was known before he had his name changed by deed poll), Reg and Dave Mash, Taz became everybody's fourth favourite Funjunkie Editor and quickly rose to fame through his unique blend of pointless crap and his one and only invention: Dehydrated Water.
Around the third quarter of 2003, sales of Dehydrated Water took a nosedive and threatened to bankrupt UK Funjunkie Enterprises, one of the 163 subsidiary companies of The World Funjunkie Corporation (TWFC). TWFC pulled the plug and shut down the Newcastle office in late September, and Taz was forced to relocate to Bristol. Soon after relocating, TWFC was hit with a tax bill the likes of which had never been seen before by any multinational corporation. Funjunkie baled out and was forced to sell up its massive stocks of freshwater Wombats. Taz was promoted and set to work on liquidating over three quarters of Funjunkie's subsidiary companies while Wild and Reg prepared to move Funjunkie's remaining assets to the last surviving tax haven, Mars.
Not long after, Funjunkie moved its whole operation to Mars and Taz continued commuting to Earth every Wednesday. Taz's favourite Earth haunt is the bar outside the Interplanetary terminal of Heathrow airport, and his favourite biscuits are Fig Rolls.
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Close Encounters of a Musical Kind
Igor Stravinsky was very happy with his closing music for the ballet "The Firebird" but when it was pointed out by his friends in the pub that John Williams had used almost the same thematic structure in the music for the closing scene of "Close Encounters of the Third Kind" he decided to use a radical new musical form which lead to such masterpieces as "Petrouschka" and "The Rte of Spring"
Unreliable Facts from The Brains Trust |
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A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the Dog up and starts swinging it around his head. Alarmed, a shop assistant calls out: 'Can I help, sir?' 'No thanks,' says the blind bloke. 'Just looking.'
- Tommy Cooper |
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| Women: Tiptoe through the TwoLips |
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DeathGob
